Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Usul Walks Amongst Us Again!   1 comment

Day 283 / 4751 C. E., Vidran, planet Videra —

A rather neat little café and wine bar had been constructed near Ariel Sherman’s home, and the golden cyborg tried to drop into the place at least once a month.  Normally, top-name entertainers tried to keep their private time to themselves.  Ariel Sherman, CRO, COV, and one of the best-known performing stars in the quadrant, almost always managed to pass her time quietly in this café, whether by herself, with members of her ‘borg family, or friends from town.  Partly, it was because this was Videra, and the laws of the pleasure planet that was Ariel’s home and place of work could be summed up in a sentence:  “Feel free to do whatever you want, so long as it does no harm to yourself or others.”  Native Viderans were apparently taught this in the womb; they were always exquisitely polite, there when you needed help, and otherwise let you live your life in peace and quiet — not antisocial, just understanding that you wanted to pursue your pleasure and had the right to do so without interference.

Which was what Ariel was doing now, sitting in the café alongside Dara Furtano-Fa, her close friend and fellow ‘borg.  The pair were hanging out beside the coffee bar, with frothy drinks in hand or beside them.  Between bouts of conversation, whenever someone passed by carrying a similar beverage, Ariel would smile and exchange a few words of greeting that were distinctly ritualistic in form.  Dara had learned the words instantly, of course, from listening to Ariel and the others, but they meant little to her.  After another lifeform, this one a Zovitchian with lemon-yellow skin and a nearly flat nose in its elongated head, had bowed to them both and clinked his cup against theirs, Dara turned to her mentor and friend and murmured, “And you really don’t know that much about what this is all about?”

Find out what it’s all about on the next page

Super Evil

Okay, now I can top that one.

Maybe this photo went to Evil Medical School….

(You can see the photo as part of the Making an Entrance album — though the counter has advanced far beyond this photo suddenly — and read the original poem by me.)

Posted April 30, 2017 by Harper Ganesvoort in Humor

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Amazing Photo Shares

If you’ve been to my Flickr stream, you’ll see that I put up most of my photos under Creative Commons sharing allowances.  As long as you attribute who took the photo, I’m usually cool with the use.  Well, Cajsa Lilliehook added a plurk tonight, talking about some of the…interesting…uses her own photos have been put to.  Someone apparently illustrated an article on food spots in Palos Verdes, Calif. with a photo of a kale burrito she took one time.

That made me wonder where my own photos have been to, so I Googled “photo by Harper Ganesvoort”, and this is what I’ve found:

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Falling Down in Worship

fall-down-in-worship

Falling to his knees, the petitioner stretched out his arms and sent his voiceless plea to the skies, sending forth his plea to the goddesses with all his soul.

He soon got his answer.

In person.

you-interrupted-our-meditations-for-that

“You interrupted our meditations for that??? the goddess shouted, her face enraged at the petitioner’s impertinence. The walls of the temple trembled from the volume of the creature’s voice, while the man on the bolster before her cringed.

The goddess’ sister circled around to the fool’s backside, a sword of light materializing in her glowing hands.  “You know that greater men than you have died at our hands for lesser sins than this.”

“But, gracious ladies,” the wretch burbled, arms outstretched, “I did not mean to offend!”

“And yet you did,” the goddess hissed.  “And so you shall pay for what you have done.”  She stretched forth a glowing hand, and the glow surrounded the poor fellow, who screamed and writhed — and then seemed to condense and curdle into himself.  A flash of light, and then, where he had knelt, a silver platter rested, filled with a pile of a strange yellow substance.

The goddess picked the platter up and smiled grimly.  “That should make the idiot happy.  He did ask me to make him a plate of scrambled eggs, after all.”

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Harper and Jem wear the Amina gacha outfit from Luas, and Singapore boots from KC Couture.  Harper’s hair:  no.match_no.sleep; Azoury Secret collar.  Jem’s hair:  Letituier Budha; Zibska Varushka collar.  Conan’s outfit:  T. E. D. Tuilo.  All skins by Plastik (Constella/Constus series, various shades).

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Posted December 30, 2016 by Harper Ganesvoort in Fantasy, Humor

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Waitin’ For the Bus

Waitin' For the Bus

Waiting for the bus.
Where is the bus?
The bus is late.
Waiting for the bus in the rain.
(in the rain)
When the bus come?
Where the bus at?
Got my bus pass.
Bus is much better than a train.
(than a train)….

If you want to hear this, watch the video below.  Sadly, Conan didn’t want to learn about it; he seems to be a touch bored….

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Only Half as Evil

Half Evil

Once in a while, you catch the numbers just right….

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Posted November 6, 2015 by Harper Ganesvoort in Humor

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Duty Shift

Duty Shift

Why, oh why, didn’t I put on a frackin’ watch when I got dressed for that date?  And, of course, I never asked him for the time, either…until fifteen minutes before I was supposed to report for shift.

Thank the gods I did that much, at least.  Otherwise, I’d be beaming up from right there in the restaurant.  Oh, wouldn’t that be great for the career!  This is bad enough as it is; not only am I on duty for the next four hours in high heels, but I swear I heard someone call me “Lieutenant Cinderella” as I shot through the tram station outside the command center….

Sigh.

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Posted October 29, 2015 by Harper Ganesvoort in Humor

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